What a woman needs.........is another woman
Several months ago upon speaking with my dear friend Mary Ann, I realized with great satisfaction, how much I enjoy her company and wisdom. Women just provide something for each other that a man cannot provide. What is this?......I think to myself, well its loyalty, honesty and plain old fashion realism. I decide that a womens group would be ideal for myself and some close women friends, all of us in the 40 and up category. Tonight we meet at Mary Ann's house, (her husband just left for a bicycle tour for the weekend). The group consists of Myself, Mary Ann, Lisa (of the sweet 16), Lisa (of the "a comforter is not a bedspread), and Chris who is Mary Ann's neighbor (who's husband left her, claiming he wants to have fun - huh!). These women are spirited, kind, funny, smart, spiritual and strong.
We are all forty something and then some. Our meetings consists of wine, food, laughter, honesty, sharing and advise after good listening. Most of our meetings are supportive and constructive. We discuss life, our children, work, and very often the men in and out of our lives. It is not a vengeful discussion but one that faces our mistakes, the good times and how we can improve our lives. Each of us has a story to share, providing some honest wisdom to the others. It is a group where we can be ourselves and not be afraid of being rejected. We respect each other and look to each other for solace when we need. It is a place where we all feel safe and loved without conditions.
In one of our sessions I posed a question, "what advice would you give to a younger women"? Following are some of the things we believe in:
1. Educate yourself.
2. Have your own savings account even if married.
3. Love your body now for in 10 years it will change, drastically.
4. Be true to yourself.
5. Surrender to what you cannot control, it will be less painful.
6. Don't give up your dreams, ever...
7. Love, respect and honor yourself first.
8. Believe..........always
9. Always do your best...
10. Don't take anything personally, its usually other peoples stuff.
11. Say what you mean and stick with it.
12. Falling in love is a wonderful journey when you no longer need it to be complete.
I can probably go on with the list, but you get the gist of it. We all agree that marriage and relationships are wonderful, when there is mutual respect, honor, humor and kindness. We all understand that we are on a journey and we are explorers in a world of immense vastness and possibilities. So here is to our journey and being enlightened.......salute!!
We are all forty something and then some. Our meetings consists of wine, food, laughter, honesty, sharing and advise after good listening. Most of our meetings are supportive and constructive. We discuss life, our children, work, and very often the men in and out of our lives. It is not a vengeful discussion but one that faces our mistakes, the good times and how we can improve our lives. Each of us has a story to share, providing some honest wisdom to the others. It is a group where we can be ourselves and not be afraid of being rejected. We respect each other and look to each other for solace when we need. It is a place where we all feel safe and loved without conditions.
In one of our sessions I posed a question, "what advice would you give to a younger women"? Following are some of the things we believe in:
1. Educate yourself.
2. Have your own savings account even if married.
3. Love your body now for in 10 years it will change, drastically.
4. Be true to yourself.
5. Surrender to what you cannot control, it will be less painful.
6. Don't give up your dreams, ever...
7. Love, respect and honor yourself first.
8. Believe..........always
9. Always do your best...
10. Don't take anything personally, its usually other peoples stuff.
11. Say what you mean and stick with it.
12. Falling in love is a wonderful journey when you no longer need it to be complete.
I can probably go on with the list, but you get the gist of it. We all agree that marriage and relationships are wonderful, when there is mutual respect, honor, humor and kindness. We all understand that we are on a journey and we are explorers in a world of immense vastness and possibilities. So here is to our journey and being enlightened.......salute!!
10 comments:
Maria,
"S.E.!" I love our little groups! I'll have to have everyone over to my mess, oops, I mean house during the summer! All of these women are lovely, and I'm so glad that you invited me to be a part of these wonderful "meetings"! They really are enlightening, and there's always an abundance of comfort and support.
xoxo
Where do I sign up? Your group is exactly what I need- in fact, now that I think about it, I'm trying to use blogging for the same purpose served by your group.
Hugs,
Betty
Good morning ladies. It is a wonderful group. Betty if you live near by - com'on over!! Blogging is my next best therapy. Truly women just get women.You can always initiate the start of a group yourself.
Have a great day everyone...
Wonderful! I was planning to have a similar group! It's still in the planning! I am calling it 'Wacky Wednesday' but it will be held in the afternoons,,,as I have other obligations...kids,,meals, etc...!
Lots of laughter, talk, discussions...right now it's up in the air!
What better fun to spend an afternoon or evening than with your female friends?
Have a great time!
Feel like an interloper again, but I'm going to comment anyway. (By the way, a lot of empty wine bottles on that table.)
Since I don't have a daughter, I'm not sure what advice I'd give a younger woman. Whether it's a young man or a young woman, it's so important to develop a marketable skill. It goes a long way towards self-reliance, which should be every young person's goal. Guess that'd be it.
Hi Maria:
I agree spending time with other women is so empowering. Every Friday night a group of us meet for dinner and just have fun. Helen
Matty you should do it....Im sure you have so much to contribute....
Dave - You are never an interloper. I am flattered that you visit. BTW - I must admit I personally had a little too much wine with cheese.
Hi Helen - Our little group is truly healing for most of us and we eagerly look forward to the next. Timing is an issue a lot but we do make an effort and when we do -- it is so worth it.
Hey Dave - I will be heading out to Allen's family reunion on 7/7/07 in Indiana, then stopping by Michigan. If there is anything exciting going on, let me know.
Oh wow what a wonderful idea, and everything you have said is so true. I think as women we can say things to each other that we would never say to a man friend.
Quite often I feel I need to say something and get things off my chest, but who do I talk to, who would truly understand and it would be a woman. But who to trust. As i feel trust a very important thing to have when in a group like that.
Well done and ladies have fun.
Your advice to a younger woman I dont think could be more true. I am frequent reader of your blog, but this is my first time I think commenting. I really like your blog...its very validating. For I am a younger woman, I am in my late 20's and will certainly listen to the voice of an older woman. After you, have the experience to back your advice up.
ROXY
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